To DC Comics,

You suck.

For, but not limited to, the reasons listed here, DC Comics has been found guilty of publishing utter shite and taking the company-wide crossover into over-bloated insanity.

• For saddling Will Pfieffer and Dwayne McDuffie with lame tie-ins while they are a perfect fit for the books they're writing. No one cares about Salvation Run, we want Catwoman running the East End and a good Justice League story.
• For giving Bruce Jones work.
• For Countdown. Garbage.
• For Infinity Man being the New God Killer. I'm sorry if that spoils it for you, but since they made it so damn easy to figure it out, you shouldn't be surprised. I mean, really, frickin' Infinity Man? Who didn't guess that and think, "It can't be Infinity Man. That's too easy." Fuck you, Stalin.
• For replacing Greg Rucka with Bruce Jones on Checkmate.
• For Trials of Shazam! and the fact that a twelve issue mini-series hasn't ended fifteen months later. And the hack job Winick did on Captain Marvel, Billy Batson & Freddie Freeman. Save your magic scripts for Juniper Lee and give us the superhero Captain Marvel is supposed to be.
• For bringing back The War That Time Forgot and having it written by Bruce Jones.
• For Gotham Underground being a prelude to Salvation Run but coming out at the same time.
• For The Resurrection of Ra's Al Ghul. What's the point if Ra's gets drugged and locked in Arkham the very next month?
• For A.J. Curry-Aquaman talking down to Superman & Batman. That was just crap.
• For the Forerunner back-up in Countdown to Adventure. Ugh.
• For the Eclipso back-up in Countdown to Mystery. What the hell is that, some filed away crap you just decided to throw on the back of Dr. Fate?
  

Everybody Get Random

I need that jacket. Today.

As a budding HeroClix player, I sometimes think about the Clix I would like to see made, like X-jacket Cyclops. He would have I DON'T HAVE CLAWS(Willpower), Leadership, Close Combat Expert, 9MM(Range Combat Expert) and FIRST X-MAN(Perplex for every X-Men Team member within 10 spaces).

Another idea I had was Noh-Varr Marvel Boy. He would have BUG DNA(Leap/Climb), KREE WARRIOR(Close Combat Expert), PLODEX(Exploit Weakness), SPIT(Mind Control), FINGERNAIL(Energy Explosion), & MUSIC TO MY EARS(Toughness). Yes, I want to build a Morrison team.

The Legendary Heroes Pitt figure? It's huge. HUGE.

We recorded the latest Big Monkey Podcast on Thursday with a special guest:Mike Pellegrino of Are You Feelin Big Mike? To say the least, it was memorable.

Not to put down Justice League of America Wedding Special, but someone needs to let McKone know who is or isn't active when doing group shots. Having Jack Knight in his Starman gear, Black Condor(Golden Age) in costume, Tempest without his white hair and pale skin, Space Ranger(?), and somehow Dr. Fate is just too much for this continuity whore to deal with.
That said, it was the best Justice League writing in almost three years or more. Dwayne McDuffie took what would have been a throwaway special and made it a springboard into the new Justice League storyline. Awesomeness ensues.

Moon Knight will save you.

Last Week Kicked All Kinds Of Ass

Read Green Lantern: Sinestro Corps Special Prologue. Right now! For not only the ending, but for everything before and to be on the ground floor. I don't care if you haven't read an issue of Green Lantern before and don't even know who or what Kilowog is, buy it and read it NOW!

I got the Heroclix Legion of Super-Heroes Starter Set and something interesing caught my attention. The Ultra-Boy click is 30 points more than the Young Superman (release the damn name, Spawn of Siegel & Shuster!) click. Some would say that is because Ultra-Boy has more experience at that point in Supes' development. I say Jo Nah has the invaluable quality of being a certified badass.

And apparently tennis still exists a thousand years from now.

I picked up three of the Avengers Heroclix booster packs. In them, I got Ares, Iron Lad, Namorita (R.I.P.), Wonder Man, Moon Knight, Giant-Man, Crossbones, the Red Skull with Cosmic Cube, the Living freakin' Laser, WWII Ultimate Captain America (my favorite costume), Luke Cage, USAgent, the Blazing Skull (I love insane heroes), Yondu (of Guardians of the Galaxy, can you believe it?) and the Winter Soldier. It's like fate contained in cardboard and plastic.

Speaking of insane heroes, Cable & Deadpool came out. I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but read Cable & Deadpool. Jon Milan does a great impression of Rob Liefeld.

I got the first two volumes of Scott Pilgrim from Amazon.com and only after reading them do I feel slightly cheated out of not having a hot ninja delivery girl drop them off. Still, now I know why indy comics exist.

I found an old Dwayne McDuffie Avengers West Coast story. It has monster trucks. There will be a post.

But still some things did bug me...

I don't know what's going on with Supergirl and Wonder Girl in Teen Titans and Amazons Attack!, but it reeks of Terra from the Teen Titans cartoon. And I have no love for the Terra from the Teen Titans cartoon. She sucked just a shade under Geo-Force does regularly. Are there any teen male heroes who react like petulant children whenever something happens they don't feel is fair? I don't see them.

How hard is it to remember the status of a character you not only created but depowered four months ago? Must be a little hard, because for some reason Mike Carey has Pan in the group of monitors at the end of the first Endangered Species side story.